happy half birthday

Little Miss T turned one and a half today and I am wondering if this is the point in which we will start referring to Miss T in years rather than months? I mean you don't hear many parents say their kids are 15 and 4 months or 184 months do you... That would be weird right...And now she is one and a half something tells me her second birthday (and third and eighth) is going to creep up on us super fast. Stop growing little T!!! So in order to not jump ahead to fast and to consciously cement in history what Miss T was doing at one and a half i thought I'd write a little list of mummy's favourites.

1. Anything exciting or new is observed with a  a dramatic 'Wow', so more like ' woooow' and any spills or damage or anything not quite right with an ' oh noooooo' accompanied by a concerned hand to her mouth. Classic

2. Miss T has taken on the task of putting Popo's bed outside each morning. It is her first task in the morning, even preceding her milk. She collects it from the kitchen floor and drags it out the back door. Thanks bubba.

3.  Popo is fed more treats than ever before as Miss T loves heading to the laundry to treat him all day long proclaiming 'more Popo more' Followed by ''sit Popo sit' (which sounds a lot like shit popo shit :)) before rewarding him with his treat.

4. Miss T's babies are forever needing to 'poo poo' and if I am not quick enough this results in her poor little bubba's heading down the toilet. Now when I here ' bubba poo poo' I must react instantly and race to the bathroom.

5. Miss T is obsessed with showers, the park and drawing and at any time of the day can wonder up and ask,
' ower yes?' ( shower yes)
' paak ye?' (park yeah) or
' wower?' (can I draw flowers).

6. Miss T clearly understands the concept of sleep (despite choosing not to for almost a month recently). How I know this...

a) She likes to ' play sleep' in our bed. ' night night mumma' she repeats and run into our bed and insists I lie with her. Once she has approved my position she proclaims ' shhh shh night night' and squints her eyes shut. This brings Miss T great delight and mumma too after a long day (except when we have guests over as this is a little awkward).

b) Her babies are placed in her cot and told ' shh bubba shh' all day long. Yes her bubba's poo poo and sleep a lot!. She even pats their little chests and leaves the room and stands outside her door saying ' shh bubba night night shh bubba'. seriously! Someone's been paying attention...

Happy half birthday Miss T, mumma and dada loves you x 

tough gig

This mumma thing is hard. Yes it is absolutely the best thing EVER but at the same time is a really tough gig. There I said it, sometimes I think honestly is the best policy and sometimes us mumma's struggle and I am sure the daddy's do also. I certainly don't wish to sound negative but I have spent the last few weeks struggling with the myth that is 'motherhood'. You know the one portrayed by every nappy advert under the sun...giggling, sleeping, calming...when our life is more like...giggling, crying, giggling, tantruming, tiny bit of sleeep, calm, catastrophic, then giggling again. I am lucky enough to have some divine girlfriends around me (and a loving hubby) who have reassured me that my feelings of confusion and uncertainty are very normal. Miss T is still the most engaging, humorous and free spirited individual I have ever met however along side these sentiments I have been surprised and often stumped by the complexities that are motherhood and toddlerhood for that matter.

For years before the arrival of Miss T I dreamt of being a mumma. You know a calm divine earth mother who made her own play dough and never lost her cool. I dreamt of afternoons sipping coffee and tea and nibbling goodies with the girls uninterrupted ( HA!) while our charming kiddies played. I dreamt of endless cuddles and constant satisfaction. Of long walks with a happy bubba in her pram. Of mumma and bubba dates to the park or the local coffee shop where we were both just happy to sit together and laugh. My perception didn't involve sleep deprivation (STILL 1.5yrs on) and it certainly didn't include cooking ( I SUCK) and cleaning (YEP SUCK AGAIN). So I guess this is where I have come unstuck. My perception was totally off. For me anyway.

The hubby thinks I am in denial about being a mumma (He says this in the most endearing way I might add) and he also apparently loves that I am more like a teenager playing mum...And I guess I have to agree. I will never care about the best way to soak clothes or how to bake the tastiest pie or how to make play dough. It just isn't me. Actually I did consider making play dough one afternoon but quickly realised we only have pink Himalayan salt in the house and certainly not 1 kilo of it like the recipe required. There is nothing more I want than to be the best mumma for Miss T but at the same time I kind of don't want to pack baby wipes, nappies, snacks and a change of clothes just to grab a coffee that is likely to last 5 minutes...Does that make me less of a mumma. I am thinking no.

So seasoned mumma's out there I would love some pearls of wisdom to help me on my journey or mumma's a little less experienced like me what works for you or what have you found most challenging on your journey thus far?

Lucky Miss T has a surrogate Great Aunt who made her Playdough the other day :)

Miss T playing mumma x

every cloud has a silver lining

Last week in the world of Miss T was disastrous. There is no other way to describe the chaos that arrived at our doorstep. Hubby overseas for work, me pregnant and exhausted, Miss T sick- unable to drink, eat or suck her beloved dummy which equated to Miss T being unable to sleep for longer than 30 minutes at a time…the worst of the nights she clocked naps at 7.30-8.00, 10.00-10.30, 12.30-1.00, 4.30-5.00. Yep disaster.

I know chaos arrives at every doorstep from time to time but my goodness it doesn’t make it any easier. We made it through of course (with the help of amazing family and friends) and we are back to domestic bliss...or our variation of...with a healthy bubba, slightly more rested mumma and a present dadda. Miss T had her first play with one of her best buddies yesterday which injected us both with a whole lot of positive energy and in turn my optimism is peaking. Yes last week was disastrous but the silver lining...every cloud has one right... is that my dummy obsessed bubba was so betrayed by her sore mouth and sickness that she lost her relationship with her beloved. Miss T no longer searches for her dummy or needs it to sleep and her baby obsession is over. This can only be a good thing, a new found independence but I have also found myself from time to time feeling a little sad for her. She said goodbye to a special friend in the most abrupt manner and I also suspect said goodbye to babyhood forever.

The timing is uncanny as Miss T’s mumma (ok ME) is also saying goodbye to an era…my 20’s. As I hit the BIG 30 I feel incredibly grateful for the wonderful family and friends I have, for the fabulous husband and family we are building, for the chaos and bliss that is Miss T, for the amazing new friends I have made since embarking into motherhood, and for the blessed life we live (these are all my silver lining's)….but I do still feel a little pang of panic…Will I blink and wake up age 40, 50 or 60 and consequently Miss T 11, 21, 31? Am I saying goodbye to my bubba Miss T and hello to toddler Miss T and what else will change for me in my 30's...

Miss T with her beloved's back in the day...I couldn't help but revisit this photo.

playing with one of her besties

Little toddlers x

 

don't tell daddy

I had a moment driving Miss T home the other day from her Yaya’s. I realised that I was being a little bit of  a hypocrite and quite a cheeky Mumma. I was feeding my almost 1.5 year old an M&M at almost each traffic light just to keep her quiet. (yep you read that right!) Great strategy Mumma! At the time I felt quite guilty but this morning I am finding it quite funny. The poor hubby would have been scolded for this type of behaviour and in fact was somewhat recently…I hopped out of bed. The two of them were so peaceful on the couch watching basketball. Miss T was so content and quietly nibbling on something.

'what is she eating for breakfast?'

‘she wanted tiny teddies!’ 

‘so you gave her tiny teddies. Seriously!’

So how did we get to this moment of serious misjudgement by me...

1. I was tired after working

2. The little monkey wouldn’t stop crying hysterically

3. I was trying to sneak the odd M&M into my own mouth without her seeing

4.  She saw and she put out her sweet little hand and said ‘me’

I thought oh why not. Who will see. And one became two and two became three and so on... And why am I telling you this, I guess to clear my conscious and to proclaim I can do better! Don't get me wrong we give Miss T the odd treat but I am just thinking that perhaps a bartering system of chocolate for quiet isn't such a great idea. I am not naive enough to think there won't be more of these moments and I no doubt will use the old ' don't tell daddy' often over the next oh 20 years but I am hoping they will be few and far between.

Once my own dad told me ‘parents aren’t perfect, we all make mistakes and we are only learning' and right now this little pearl of wisdom is ringing true. Sorry no more M&M’S for you Miss T.


Miss T loving her 'Gumnut' freckle on a saturday morning at the markets.
A treat daddy knew about...

Photo's courtesy of Miss T's gorgeous godmother Aunty La

 

party in my tummy

We are whole heartily embracing what can only be called Miss T’s new obsession…the IPAD and more specifically the teletubbies (that smiling sun baby is genius) and Yo Gabba Gabba…I officially don’t care that we may have a fight on our hands when she is 5, 10 or 15 and won’t put the damn thing down but until then the IPAD is creating a happy bubba and therefore a happy mumma…happy daddy and happy Popo.

The wonders of technology are allowing a much more peaceful breakfast time and the occasional successful coffee in public. She loves watching her smiling sun baby while munching on toast and on two occasions so far we have actually sat for a coffee for over 20 minutes…unheard of for the last well, 16 months of our lives…Yes we sip our coffee to ‘there’s a party in my tummy, a party in my tummy, a party in my tummy'... or to the catch phrase ‘babies are awesome!’ from one of her favourite episodes, but hey you can’t have everything.

 

 

I am quietly hoping I am not the only one though and I look forward to hearing of your 'guilty pleasure'?

big girl? baby girl?

Ok we are back. I guess we have been busy. Me growing another little bubba human being and Miss T perfecting a fair few new skills

1. how to throw a good old tantrum (if this isn't the terrible 2's I am terrified!)
2. how to quack like a duck, bark like a dog (or Popo in our case) and roar like a lion
3. how to feed herself with a spoon (she has become quite the pro and really delights in this new skill)
4. An almost mature understanding of item in the house and who they belongs to…mum’s bag, dad’s hat, popo’s ball…she says and delivers...this seriously blows my mind.
5. And probably the most endearing of her new achievements…an absolute gusto ritual of saying goodbye or goodnight to Apollo. This involves a repetitive ‘night night Popo or bye Popo” followed by a massive cuddle and kiss on the lips. We do not leave the house or head to bed until this is completed.

Yes Miss T is growing up before our very eyes and most days we see this big girl who is well on her way to becoming a big sister in November.

But not on Tuesday. Instead I saw a baby girl, my precious baby girl terrified by a 4 year old Iron Man at the park. The playground was full of other little kiddies having a great time and Miss T seemed to be the only one impacted by a little boy dressed in costume from head to toe. I watched her spot him and observe him from a distance with serious concern before bursting into tears and running for comfort. And with me she sat until Iron Man headed home. I felt such compassion for her little mind that was trying to understand why he looked so different and so scary but I won’t lie, I quietly enjoyed the long cuddles and company I received at a pace so foreign in the busy world that is Miss T.

Keeping a close eye on Iron Man

Not convinced about this guy

 

FOMO

We have known for quite some time now that Miss T has a fear of missing out, you know the dreaded FOMO that prevents her from ever slowing the pace, or sleeping too long or sleeping at all when we have friends and family over. It's a facet of her robust personality that we have always found hilarious. Nothing changed on our recent trip to Bali. Miss T woke like clock work every morning at 4.30AM! (Woo! love a family holiday). Our fabulous 4.30am starts meant the hubby and I took turns on the graveyard shift and desperately waited for the sun to rise (while trying to entertain a highly 'spirited' 14 month old ) so we could make a dash to the beach and restore our sanity.

What we did however discover during our little get away was that mumma in fact also suffers from a severe case of  FOMO...we were lucky enough to have a divine nanny helping us with Miss T for portions of the day. While she took our darling to the kids club, for a swim at the pool or watched her while she slept, the hubby would routinely counsel me, mumma as I descended into a FOMO moment.
The hubby would whisper sweet words of encouragement to get me through...

'honey I know you want her to want to sit with us while we sip coffee but she wants to play with the kids and all the toys'
'you deserve a break'
'babe, she is sleeping your not missing out on anything'.

Now if I had known that for the entire week after returning from paradise Miss T was not going to sleep properly, nor sleep more than 30minutes max during the day( perhaps to catch up on our time apart!? Thoughtful daughter I have...) then maybe I would have dealt with my FOMO moments a little better bit who was to know...

Like mother like daughter it seems.

 

 

pure magic

Everyone tells you they grow up so fast. That before you know it they will be teenagers, getting married or having their own babies. They say that, believe it or not you will miss even the hardest moments and all those sleepless nights. And I believe them. My baby girl is growing up so fast. And over the last week or so (that has been a little trying- hand, foot and mouth virus for poor Miss T) I have tried to remember these words. When she has insisted on extra time, cuddles and attention even at 2am I have tried to remember these words.



I'm sorry my post has been a little delayed but with a sick, clingy bubba I have had to put Miss T first and to be honest I have felt like I have had little to offer. And any down time I have had, I have spent panicking about whether Miss T would be well enough for our up coming holiday in 5 sleeps time...And all I've got to say right now is, arn't they just pure magic. When Miss T hurled herself at me for extra cuddles all day today I knew it was her way of saying thank you. When she repeatadly said ' Dadda, bye bye Dadda' all morning long, I thought she certainly knows how to work her father. And when she proceeded to inform me that we were going for a walk by collecting her backpack, my hand AND by turning off the TV. I thought yep they are pure magic 

Trying to tell me something Miss T?

Even unwell this girl knows how to smile x

See you when we get back from our little getaway x

don't sweat the small things

Miss T is heading on 14months old! Seriously! What has surprised me the most is that I am much more relaxed now about the small things. Obviously I care enormously about her health and well being but I am far less fussy or (obsessive perhaps) than I thought I would be…I like to think this is a good thing. This week saw Miss T enjoy her new day bed... while some would see germs, dog hair and grime (including the hubby who just can’t handle it) I see a cheeky little lady enjoy her best pals place of rest.

Miss T even enjoyed the odd TV lunch (something I swore I would never do!) but on these few days guess what, I did it and Miss T ate fabulously and mumma enjoyed a slightly less challenging experience…

And we even enjoyed a bit of gelato at 3.30pm. Yep that’s right, just before dinner time, to celebrate the news of a dear friends shortly arriving baby girl…yep life is good x

 

homework

I had my first piece of homework last week. For daycare that is. It made me a bit excited about all the little future projects Miss T and I will work on together. I absolutely love the idea of the dining table being overtaken by pre-school, kindy, school, high school and university projects in the many years to come. I know Miss T didn’t request an enthusiastic art and craft obsessed mumma but that’s what she got. We are going to have sooo much fun. Ok maybe by university (or even high school) she will be letting me down lightly when I make assignment suggestions but until that day I am going to be her little second hand. For Daycare I needed to complete,  in visuals two little work sheets titled ‘ About Me’ and ‘Our Family’. The questions were simple but they really made me stop and think.  As she would be putting it up in her classroom wall I wanted to be authentic to Miss T and her family and I wanted to put the biggest smile on her face in the process. Is I completed my work it was amazing to see how Miss T's identity is already so complex. I have always said to the hubby, 'isn't it amazing that she has been on this earth for just over 400 days ( give or take depending on when I get all deep and emotional) but already it is clear that she was always meant to be here. We have just spent the first part of our life waiting for her'. And doing this little bit of homework cemented this for me. On these two little worksheets all the most important and influential people in Miss T's life are present, her history is spelt out, her loves, passions and strengths are already present. Poor Miss T better hope mumma doesn't get this soppy over every assignment...

Walking home from daycare. Miss T is getting the hang of her new routine.

A snippet of our work in progress...

It went down like this...

There have been a number of incidents over the last few days that havn't been exactly note worthy mumma moments for me. I am not proud of them but when I look back on them this morning they are kind of funny. I do take pride in the kind of mumma I am most of the time so it is hard for me to decide which of these moments I am confident enough to disclose. All I can say is, it isn't always easy being a mumma, especially being a sick mumma and atleast I can laugh at myself.

Should I tell you about the two men (working for a pretty worthy cause) outside the local supermarket that I ever so slightly attacked. Who to my defence wouldn't leave me alone when I was feeling slightly faint (yay for gastro)... ok why not...My internal dialogue should have been 'stay calm and carry on' but it wasn't. It went down like this.. me storming out of supermarket, Miss T in pram losing her mind, hubby with dog vanished, me furious and obviously not really coping...

Young man(YM): are you looking for something?
Mumma(M): yes my hubby and dog
Miss T (MT): still screaming
YM : I havn't seen a husband with a dog here lately! (HELPFUL)
M: well that's interesting because they were here with me 3 minutes ago

YM: why don't you talk to us instead?

M: Seriously, I don't feel well and I am not in the mood (hands waving, feel stomping)
MT: still screaming
Hubby (H): cruising down the street loving his sunday
M: gives pram to hubby, tries to lock pram, pram wont lock, kicks pram lock a number of times...
M: ranting about young men who won't leave me alone
H: babe, they arn't in your world, they don't understand that you are stressed out and unwell. They are just going about their day...sunday bliss I tell you

 



Or should I tell you about my mexican stand off with the hubby this morning  Much less aggressive but never the less I was determined to win. It went down like this...

 

6.20 Miss T wakes and starts crying, I roll over and look at the time, I snuggle back into bed and hope that the hubby will attend to our crying bubba. It should only take a few minutes. (It is a tactic I have used often and had a high success rate with. Why? Because as Miss T spent a good part of her first year as a notoriously bad sleeper, the deal was I did the nights and dadda did the mornings. This worked well but now that Miss T is a pretty good sleeper we do occassionally have a stand off).

 

6.23 Miss T continues to cry (I swear I am not a bad mumma), I look over in hubby's direction to see if there is any movement, nope nothing. I roll back over and keep trying, bubba is still crying (I swear I am not a bad mumma), hubby seems pretty determined himself this morning...I jump out of bed with a little huff and puff, look back at out bed and all becomes clear. There is no hubby only pillows. Hubby has gone to the gym...

 

Atleast I can laugh at myself. I like to think I am not the only one who sometimes sinks instead of swims...I would love to hear of some of your meltdown moments?

 

Mumma has had a few of these moments...



so obviously there was no hubby!

 

our fav haunt

We have been a little bit out of action over the last week as poor Miss T has had a nasty cold and cough. We have had our fair share of sleepless nights and we are both suffering from serious cabin fever. I've also had to decline a bundle of social mumma activities this week and I am well and truly ready to have a well bubba again. Come on bubba get better!!!

So today as she was feeling a little bit better and the rain had temporarily subsided we headed to one of our current fav haunts...This gorgeous little hole in the wall cafe. We sipped hot coffee, nibbled on some goodies, read the Sunday paper and people watched...ha! Who am I kidding!!! Our fav haunt pre-Miss T may have been an inner city cafe but today we headed to a humble suburban park. Who would have thought this would bring mumma and dadda (and bubba of course!) so much satisfaction.

Before heading to the park the hubby drove around the neighbourhood in circles trying to get Miss T to catch up on some much needed sleep while I ran around in circles in the supermarket stocking up on much needed baby supplies and we collected take away coffee's and lunch on route. By the time we arrived at our fav, our coffees weren't so hot, neither was our food actually and there certainly wasn't time to people watch and read the paper...but Miss T was delighted and that was all that mattered. The fresh air and family time was exactly what the doctor ordered. Bring on the sunshine and a healthy Miss T.

what else?

We cannot believe what just happened. We popped Miss T into bed for her afternoon nap. We said good night or in fact 'night night bubba, night night'. We gave Miss T her precious Lambie and her beloved dummy. We left the room and commenced to recline on our couch for a breather. All very normal. We heard a little bit of chatter, a few little protests and a tiny thud. At that moment I put my money on Miss T giving the cot a little hit. Nothing too dramatic....we then heard a few more little thuds, looked at each other and say ' that's weird’ ‘what's that?' hubby said 'sounds like she is near?!' DON'T EVEN...

She was standing at her door!

Somehow our cheeky little monkey has climbed out(or fallen out)of her cot, shuffled to the door and called for us. All in her sleeping sack. Thank goodness for the manky mattress stored below her cot (you know, mumma’s occasional bed!) as it obviously lessened her fall as she made her escape. 

Miss T what else have you got in store for us? What else?
 

Someones a little tired...it pays to sleep rather than escape!

whatever works

I have (yet again) found myself running around like a mad woman today while Miss T is in daycare. My days are numbered until that dreaded, I mean lovely thing called 'work' will start to take up some of my time so right now I feel like I need to conquer all. I have just sat down to have a breather from the chaos (self inflicted mind you) and of course the first thing to pop into my mind is ' I wonder how Miss T is getting on'.

Gosh I miss my monkey. Right this minute she feels physically so far away (although she is in fact only in the next street) and I can't help but giggle and reminisce about a few of the hurdles Miss T has put me through in the last week. What are some of these challenges you ask...oh you know, wanting to sleep with the car keys...being insistent on having every coffee cup in sight...and perhaps the most difficult at present... not only refusing to sit in her pram but insisting on pushing her pram while we walk. Difficult much?!

As they say, a picture tells a 1000 words...

One of many times she has slept with the car keys this week, bless x

A big shout out to the fabulous friend who taught this little skill! Thanks!

And what has Miss T taught me this week. Mumma just do WHATEVER WORKS!

jet plane

We are on the holiday countdown. 8 weeks till our first international holiday since Miss T was born. In fact as Miss T was a delightful honeymoon baby, the first international holiday since our wedding and honeymoon. Mumma is beyond excited and Miss T isn't going to know what hit her. She has turned into quite the water baby and that is exactly what this holiday is going to entail...
pool, beach, food, sleep, (cocktail for mumma), pool, food, sleep, beach, (cocktail for mumma), sleep...you get the picture. For those experienced mumma's and dadda's out there, I know what your thinking 'this isn't going to be like all your other holidays'. Yes yes your right I might be romanticising a little...no doubt included in our time line will be tantrums, night time wakings and the works but seriously why would I dwell on that! I do feel very sorry for the poor souls who board our plane but hey what can I do. All I can think about is breakfast being made for us EVERY morning and that overrides all.

So yesterday I took Miss T to get her passport photo taken ( something I have been planning to do for the last 4 months) and my goodness it was classic. My slightly cheeky child turned it on for the camera.

Miss T's passport photo- Picture perfect if I do say so myself

Now I might have borrowed the following from the lovely Angus and Julia Stone and the context is obviously different but I think they said (or sung) it perfectly...

I wanna hold her, I wanna kiss her

She smelled of daisies, she smelled of daisies

She drive me crazy, she drive me crazy

Gonna take her for a ride on a big jet plane

Gonna take her for a ride on a big jet plane

Hey hey